


Picture Perfect

by TransparentSheepDeer



Category: Devilman (Anime & Manga)
Genre: Angst, Canon: Devilman Crybaby, Episode 5 Alteration, Hurt No Comfort, M/M, No Sex, Pictures, Unhealthy Relationships
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-29
Updated: 2019-07-29
Packaged: 2020-07-23 16:53:58
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,037
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20011651
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TransparentSheepDeer/pseuds/TransparentSheepDeer
Summary: Akira feels awful. Ryo offers an alternative coping method.





	Picture Perfect

Akira stares at the cash on the bed, then at Ryo.

Ryo stares right back, crossing his arms in front of his chest. "It's money. You know. The kind that you spend on things?"

Akira gapes, open-mouthed. "Ryo, I-I don't want to spend it like that."

Ryo clicks his tongue. "Listen, I don't know what to tell you. I'm busy. If it's that urgent, just go and take care of it. It's only natural to want to forget."

Akira shakes his head, more in confusion than in disagreement. "Ryo, I... I don't want to get a hooker."

"Then get drunk."

"I don't want to do that, either."

"Drugs?"

"An even harder nope."

"What do you want, then?" Ryo asks, exasperated. "I don't have too much time to babysit you, Akira, I have guests."

Akira bites his underlip and stares at the wall behind Ryo. "I want my parents back."

Silence follows. For how long, Akira doesn't know.

"That's not an option," Ryo finally says. "But..." He sighs and doesn't finish the sentence.

"But what?" Akira manages, even though his brain is so foggy it takes him a minute to remember how to talk.

Ryo pinches the bridge of his nose. "Okay. Let's make a deal. You wait until I'm finished with my guests, and then I came again and offer a solution. I can't promise that you'll feel better, though."

Before Akira can answer, Ryo turns on his heel and leaves the room.

Akira lays on his back and stares at the ceiling, mind completely blank. He is aware that time goes by while he does this, but he can't tell how much, if it has been five seconds or five minutes or five hours since Ryo left.

Then suddenly, the door opens, and Ryo comes in again. Akira doesn't have the energy to sit up straight.

Ryo comes to the bed and Akira notices he has his laptop with him. He doesn't ask about it, just watches Ryo tap and click.

"Here," he says after a while, and angles the laptop so Akira can see it if he sits up.

Akira does so with a grunt. He pulls the laptop onto his chest and tries to focus on the bright screen.

It is a folder filled with pictures. Akira looks at Ryo, confused.

Ryo gestures at the device. "They are photos I've saved from your mom's phone."

Akira continues to stare at him. "And you didn't think about telling me?"

"No," Ryo says flatly, without an ounce of regret. "But I'm showing you now."

Akira looks back at the screen. He moves his fingers to the track pad and opens the one in the top left.

It was taken when he graduated junior high school - the same picture he has on his wall in his room.

The next one is of the three of them - Father holds the phone up. He and Mother embrace him.

Ryo and he are on the third one, sitting in a bathtub.

Akira feels like he should be feeling happy. But he isn't. He just clicks to see the next picture, one after the other, until there are no pictures left.

Akira stares at the screen.

He doesn't know for how long.

He snaps out of it when Ryo takes the laptop from his lap.

"Better?" he asks, but he doesn't sound too interested in the answer.

Akira rubs his eyes and inhales. "Not really."

Ryo doesn't reply for a while. "So what now?"

Akira shrugs. He doesn't feel anything.

"Well," Ryo says, "if that's all I can do for you..."

Akira turns to him, slowly.

Ryo doesn't look back. He has already opened up some document- no, his email - and he is typing something in.

Akira wonders why he came for his help in the first place.

But he takes what he can get. And if that means that he will have to ask Ryo for the kind of comfort he needs, then so be it.

"Can you hug me?"

"Hmm?"

"Hug me."

Ryo doesn't even glance at him. "I'm in the middle of something."

"Well, after you finish?"

"I have a lot of other things to do afterwards."

Akira feels like his body is made out of cement.

"You can do those things later, but I need you now."

Ryo pauses. "That's..."

"You're an asshole," Akira blurts. He doesn't regret it. "I came to you for comfort, and all you do is scold me and act like your goddamn project is more important than me."

Ryo sighs, and punishes him by not responding to him.

Rage courses through Akira's bloodstream.

He balls his hands into fists. "I hate you."

"No, you don't."

Akira laughs. "Fuck you. I don't need you."

"Yes, you do."

Akira punches the wall above Ryo's head. The hit is boosted by him putting his body's weight into it.

Ryo flinches, but he looks more angry than scared.

"You're not going to achieve anything by behaving like this."

Akira sees red.

Ryo sets the laptop aside and sits up so he towers slightly above Akira. "No matter what you do, your parents won't be back. All you can do is move on."

Akira stares at him. He looks at his throat, and wonders how long it would take for Ryo to bleed out.

Ryo grabs his face and forces him to look at him. It's not an affectionate gesture. "I have given you everything. Don't you dare be so selfish."

The rage inside Akira dies down in an instant. Ryo doesn't care. Ryo doesn't give a single fuck about his parents. About his feelings, his grief.

His shoulders sink, and he buries his face in the crook of Ryo's neck. Ryo doesn't push him away.

This should do it. This qualified as a hug.

Ryo lets go of his face, but he doesn't touch him elsewhere.

Akira wants him to caress his back and tell him it was going to be okay. He wants to sob into his shoulder, for Ryo to hold him and tell him it's not his fault, to feel just a bit of comfort and relief from the presence of his best friend.

But it seems that's too much to ask for.

**Author's Note:**

> I really want to take new spins on the cliches in this fandom, don't get me wrong it's cool when everyone writes 500 versions of the same things, but I personally am in need of new content. I also seem incapable of writing an episode 5 alteration without it being purely angst & hurt no comfort so I guess that's my fate
> 
> if you liked it, please let me know through kudos & comments! :) thank you for reading!


End file.
